shanks for all the kind thoughts
my head's still feeling woozy. my breath is definitely heavier like something dark seeped through and my heart is being squeezed tight i can hardly feel a beat and try as i might i couldn't take in a deep breath and let it all out as much as i'd like to. but i know it'll all pass with time. i'm grateful to the people out there who should've said 'i told you so' and spit me in the face didn't and instead listened to my agonizing sorrow and let me wallow deliriously in self-pity for a meaningless decision that i long stood by. i didn't listen then not because i didn't know any better. i didn't stop the tears now because i deserved it. yet i am still touched that you let me fall down and sat by me taking in those things that would serve as your warnings once not too long ago. no doubt i am a silly girl who has not learned to abide to any rules of the game.
posted by novie @ 10:18 PM
whatever makes me happy
8 Comments:
Hi there, chance upon your blog when i needed some light on my own matters. No one deserves the tear they shed and not especially in your case. Being able to move-on is a big step and you have already made it this far. Kudos to you.
I couldnt agree with you more when you mentioned about someone so selfish loving someone else. Its a sad realisation when you have to know such truth. I have my fair share of loving someone like this and I am still with him reason being that when you are married to one, it's just not as simple as breaking up with a bf.
Good luck in your new found life. You truly deserve more than a selfish brat~
happiness is a matter of perspective if you could accept him and still be together i'm sure it's something great whatever you 2 share! then again i don't believe a piece of paper should hold you down because we're living our lives for ourselves not for anyone else. and like you say one certainly deserves better tho' i know it's difficult at times...
hope you find what you're after ultimately n thx for the msg ^ ^
有人说，每个交过的男朋友就像一面镜子，他让你在恋爱中跟了解自己是个这么样的人。他能让你他到真正的自己，与你从来不了解的另一面。我们在交往的过程中，学会面对自己，也学会成长。
dun waste time on this bastard.. move on.. be gald tt u didnt waste much time on him..
yup so true~ too bad he'll never learn to grow up!! how can a **** like him who did what he did 学会面对自己? he's too busy in love with himself all the time n will end up always being a coward running away...
oh....i've not visited your site for quite a while, last one i saw was your world cup photos, and thought things were going well for you....
i know you're a great person who spends a lot of effort for the other party, i dont know him, but if he decides to leave after what you have done, then he's really too foolish and not worthwhile.
anyways, jia you!!!
shinji
=)
Happened upon your blog. Sorry about your recent heartache. Can't help but wondering if you played a role in your own demise. Often the things that most attract us about someone's personality are the very issues which spell the relationship's doom. Too friendly, too fast or seemingly over concerned and sensitive are often signs of phoniness. The narcissistic person can often mimic what he imagines his partner desires, but since he is only putting on a show, it eventually runs out of steam. Instead of perceiving yourself as a victim, you might give thought to how a less narcissistic person might appear at first - early in a relationship. Perhaps not as attractive or endearing, but more genuine, nonetheless.
there is a difference between narcissism and selfishness. for one thing the latter can't be cured. having stood by such a person, the foolish me was not prepared for being callously treated like a thrown out ragged doll with the turn of his back just like that. expecting something and being prepared for it are two totally different matters. that is why i let the tears fall, not because of the grand finale. it's the moment reality sank in when i am not even worthy as a friend in his eyes or deserves better despite being together for 1 yr. and so where does that leave me?
i chose this path and i recognise rushing into relationships overwhelmed with emotions is a personality flaw which i must live with...like you say in future i should observe carefully how genuine a person is. but the scary part is the human psyche is so complex more than often i've seen how these people can appear to turn out hypocritical/two-faced in the end that i've lost faith.
perhaps i do play a protagonist in my life story but doesn't everybody?
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